


Let's Talk

by MysticDodo



Series: Conversations [1]
Category: Big Bang (Band)
Genre: Big Bang, Concert, Fanservice, GRi - Freeform, Kissing, M/M, MADE series, Nyongtory, OTP Feels, Seungri's accident, nyongtori
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-02
Updated: 2015-08-02
Packaged: 2018-04-12 15:14:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 701
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4484255
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MysticDodo/pseuds/MysticDodo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>.... let's talk about nyongtory, GD oppa. Let's talk about how you go to kiss me in front of everyone and how it makes me feel.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Let's Talk

The first time you grabbed my head and brought your face centimetres from mine, my heart stopped. Kiss? Here? On stage? Countless eyes watching? I could barely hear the screams of the fans, too busy trying to sort out the mess of thoughts inside my head; hundreds and thousands, all at once, crashing and whirling. Your hand was warm on my face, gentle, and you were smiling at me, the slight curve of your eyes making my mouth go dry. A nervous grin broke out over my face and I gently pushed you away but you held on for a few more – torturously long – seconds and we laughed as you disengaged from me.

It both terrified and excited me when you roughly cupped my head in your hands and tilted your face towards mine during the next show; a show of aggressive power. I’d been flirting with ideas on my head, somewhat hoping but dreading you doing this again, wondering if you would go all the way, give the fans - and me – what they wanted. I had been half hard by the time you turned smoldering eyes to me and fully erect by the time your body heat was cocktailing with mine.

Each time you would bring your face minimally closer. My tingling lips were ghosted by your shallow breathing and it took my entire strength to push you away to continue singing. Let’s Talk About Nyongtori. My fingers trembled as I updated instagram with a photo taken of us moments after you teased us all. I was pulling away, laughing, your hand still on me. “It seems like Jiyong oppa likes me. What should I do” I captioned, hardily believing that I was doing this. Barely believing that my Jiyongie was being so bold. After what happened, though… Things changed.

I continued to let you capture my face in your palms, try not to smile as your eyes linger on my lips. Perhaps it was because my hair was white and I felt brave as well. But you’d always release me and I tried not to be disappointed. Fanservice. A show. Tom and Jerry. We were always cautioned by our managers, scolding eyes and serious faces. They were angry after we had finished filming the music video to We Like 2 Party. We had gotten drunk, careless, left a public declaration of our claims on each others’ necks later that night (or was it early morning?) and our heads thudded louder than the furious words of our superiors. “We’re looking out for you. Stop it.” Couldn’t they understand that we had been trying for years to stop what was going on between us?

“GD oppa,” I said into the microphone moments before the routine. There were screams of delight but I was focused on you and you alone. You looked fairly surprised, your eyes slightly wider under the stage lights and make up. Maybe you couldn’t tell if I was begging you to carry on or to stop? I certainly couldn’t.

Sometimes you didn’t pull me close as if to kiss me. Sometimes you played with my tie, fingered my hair. Another, I was the one to push you away, to keep you at arms’ length. I wanted you. I wanted you to kiss me. I wanted the rumours to stop; Kiko, your sexuality, mine… I wanted the games to stop. I wanted you and me, me and you. _If you, if you, if it’s not too late can’t we get back together? If you, if you, if you’re struggling like I am, can’t we make things a little easier? I should have treated you better when I had you._ I was nearly twenty five and so old in my love for you.

One of the next songs for the MADE series has been teased by you and Papa YG. “Let’s Not Fall In Love”. I wish my heart had been told this years ago. I’m so in love with you, Kwon Jiyong. Next time – be it behind stage, in the darkest hours of the night, in front of thousands of eyes – please kiss me. No more talking. Just put your lips on mine and we can silence one another.

**Author's Note:**

> I support G-Dragon, I support Seungri. I support LGBT. Love, be it platonic or romantic or sexual or whatever, is beautiful. Love Wins! 
> 
> In other words, I am classified as gri trash... no regrets.


End file.
